husband drunk when i went into labor

Second, I would have an honest conversation about the role you want him to play in labor and delivery. First, would he normally drive after 5 drinks? I still give him crap about it almost four years later now. -Carrie, My husband rested the magazine he was reading on my legs while I lay dying WITHOUT an epidural. Jaime Clark didn't feel contractions with her first baby, either. fiizzlee = vag ** fiizzle = peen Many people told me that being induced would be really difficult, long, and painful. A simple rule for when to go to the hospital for labor is the 5-1-1 rule. . Guys like you make it possible for guys like me to find great women and kids. Money was scarce. My mom didnt kill him, just in case you wondered. It was like something from a movie. Most nights he drinks to the point of stumbling, and not . He was only slightly better with our third. In some cases, there are no signs. He hesitated and then said, I ate it all. I was so busy being in labor that I failed to notice he was munching on my all my snacks! My husband and I were so excited that we jumped right into action. During pregnancy, the cervix stays closed and plugged up with mucus (aptly called the "mucus plug"). Nesting. Haha! I hardly knew my now husband of 11 years at the time (though I already knew he was the one!) It was about 11:30 am when we finally made it to the hospital (which was on the other side of town) and after being examined by the nurse, was told I was going to have my child later that evening (at about 6 pm)! Now, no matter how many babies you have given birth to, you still never quite remember the feeling of going into labour until it actually happens again. Unbeknownst to her, it was contractions. When she left, my husband says to me, very sweetly and earnestly, Ive had many epidurals, and I just want you to know, it doesnt feel ANYTHING like a bee sting. I think he needs a friend intervention - sounds like he would not listen to you. How long has it been since you had a drink? He then goes home and sleeps on and off for 10 hours (in between bouts of explosive diahrrea) while Im at the hospital with our first newborn daughter, ALONE. Once emergency responders had arrived and . Prodromal labor can be as painful and uncomfortable as 'real' labor. You can't drive yourself, and if he's been drinking that much then you are taking cab. He almost passed out and had his own team of nurses and MY midwife helping him. Sandals and flip flops are not recommended, especially if a situation arises where you may have to go into an operating room. Ask the medical staff questions. Its not a movie wherein things change quickly. Luckily, I had the exact opposite experience . So when my mom showed up to help out, hes so busy talking to her that Im having to hit him in the arm every time a contraction came so he would rub my back the only thing I asked him to do (hard back labor). When I mentioned this is really beginning to hurt, his comment? I would go along with the game, keep a straight, often giddy face and say nothing. Grab Now! After 26 hours of Oxytocin induced labour our son arrived and my hubby had the balls to say jokingly Well, at least we know hes hers! There was never any doubt about paternity, it was just his stupid sense of humour. We went to a friends wedding about 3 weeks ago and I asked him before hand not to drink and he did anyways and got pretty drunk. "Had 'bloody show' for two weeks prior to my water breaking and even lost my mucus plug and NADA! My husband and I heeded the advice and packed a bunch of snacks. for fear that he would pass out. While crawling along, my contractions got closer together and longer. Eileen, My husband went duck hunting and forgot to charge his cell phone. Why do you women, not tell your foolish husbands long before you give birth, what you will not tolerate from him during your birth. Since I had to have a c-section he stayed in the hospital with me the 3 days sleeping on the couch and changed ALL the diapers. My husband was beyond perfect. Pregnant . I did tell him that HE would be the one calling them letting them know the situation. Raspberry Leaf Tea. The only way to stop this from happening is to let your husband know that you wont tolerate any unacceptable behavior of theirs under any circumstances. This can lead to further problems such as depression, anxiety, and social withdrawal. I am sure you are aware there are going to be a lot of long nights that you are not going to want your DH sleeping off his buzz. I was so out of it by this point (having no pain medication at all) that I did not know my husband had helped. There was a family business. He didn't drink for the majority of my pregnancy, but then went out to a work function and came home wasted (he was driven home by a coworker). Fine. For the rest of her births, she delivered at home with midwives. When one starts living with a functioning alcoholic husband, they try to take control of situations, as mentioned above, and behave as a counselor. Needless to say, he was NOT happy about that statement but I don't care. I would definitely tell him if he's buzzed he is not welcome in the delivery room because it will only cause you more distress while you're trying to bring your first child into this world. DH managed to get to the hospital after his work in time to give me a quick kiss and be kicked out for delivery. After your first childbirth, labor usually takes less time. I remember thinking . My husband was asleep in the chair and when they woke him up, he walked over to me and said, My foot hurts. REALLY? It's not good. You know, the stuff you still hold over his head. IM IN LABOR, PEOPLE!!! The next morning, I rationally explained to him that if I would have gone into labor (I was 38 weeks at that point) I would not have allowed him into the l and d room. I wouldnt have had more babys with a guy who could care less that I was having the first.. How could you have any more kids with someone after that are u crazy. I walked up and down the stairs a few times to see if it was real labor. My first child was early and I had a long hard 19 hour labor. The following morning my husband went home to get his sugar meter (he is diabetic) that he forgot. Plenty of men AND women have demanding and stressful jobs and do not need to hit the bottle to deal with it on a regular nightly basis.they remain present with their partners and families, and find non-self-destructive ways to deal with stress. Little do they know. . good luck! It is also important to seek professional. -Tifffany, My husband took so many pictures of himself in the scrubs and mask (obviously super important to document) the camera battery was almost dead when we actually had the baby! He ran away because he said he had business at work he had to attend to. My husband has never gotten a drivers license so I had to drive us the 25 minutes to the hospital while dealing with early contractions. My hero. For instance, Mike made me wait in the lobby of our building while he went to get a . You have had worse contractions then that! When the nurse came in he had to tell her the same. When one starts living with a functioning alcoholic husband, they try to take control of situations, as mentioned above, and behave as a counselor. I havent read all 237 responses, but did you get any from gay couples? Dear Amy: I am 63 and my husband (of six years) is 67. The most common mistake a wife often makes is that she starts blaming herself for her alcoholic husband. These are hilarious! There was a silence on the phone for a moment, and then in a quiet voice Grandma told Dad she was going to hang up and call back in 10 minutes, and at that time she expected a full report. It also happened to be the night of our annual street party. Most of the responses ignore the real issues, blame it on men being stupid, or just excuse his behavior. We went for a lot of walks. Thanks for the laughs though! Sept. 28, 2016. These are hilarious! The biggest sign that the bloody show has occurred is you may notice a bloody mucus discharge from your vagina. Because, he was a little bit tired. (I don't think he would like that job much!). He did later apologize. Holy fuuk. If you liked this post, follow Mommy Shorts on Facebook. If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married. Want to have a happier, healthier marriage? This must help. 1. I asked for all the ridiculous stuff your husbands pulled while you were in labor. Stand with them and help them overcome it. It might have been when he was relaying the story about how tired he was and how the day seemed to drag on forever. I would have the conversation when he isn't drinking and is in a good mood. When you go through what women go through in labor and delivery, you can tell us about being bitchy. Its a natural tendency to try and take control of the alcoholic husband in order to make things right. I am not saying what your DH is doing is right, in fact, I think 5 drinks every night is a bit heavy and you should talk to him about it. Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. When I was younger and unmarried, I had a boyfriend who was often kind of rude to me in social situations. Someone needs to tell them it is not helpful to say things likeHere we go. and This looks like a big one.. However, this might not be a good decision, ever. Oh well, possibly because it was the day before I gave birth to our 3rd child, Jack. Seriously?? of theirs under any circumstances. Pleaseselect whether I bother you once a day or once a week. Needless to say..while gasping for breath, I told him to shut up. If you are having symptoms of preterm labor, call your healthcare provider right away. I don't know what kind of birth you're planning, but the Bradley books (Husband-Coached Childbirth and Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way, IIRC) are very insistent on how important it is that the husband be there to support, etc. With my 1st son, my husband wanted to take a shower before we left for the hospital. Its a disorder or an, How to Deal With Someone Who Blames You for Everything, 15 Ways How to Have Self-Control in a Relationship. This classic, tell-tale sign of labor can appear as a big gush, or it can happen in a slow, light stream. I gave birth in a Cambodian hospital that, well lets say was set up with top notch 1950s style equipment. Wondering how to deal with an alcoholic spouse? Help her stay focused and relaxed. Imagine youre married to an alcoholic husband who drinks daily and beyond the limit, only to create a nuisance later. Driving drunk is a big effing deal. "With . I was laying on the bed playing And E was sitting in my desk chair. This will enable you to stay focused and prevent you from giving in to temptation. I was induced at 7pm, and about 1am my husband decided to go home and get some sleep (I hadnt slept at all either!) Is this the best way though? Lol, it's not the first time it's happened. There is no scientific proof to show that drinking alcohol can help in inducing labor. If your husband is an alcoholic, the more you know about the disease, the better prepared you will be to deal with it. I told my husband in the morning that I had been in labor most of the night (he slept through it). Lydia Swortzel, 36, went into labor at 21 weeks with identical twins after seven years of infertility. You don't want him to not be able to function when the baby needs to be cared for during the night. For my last birth and for this one I have been an hour away from the hospital. I used to go with him but stopped after getting pregnant as i didnt announce till 12 weeks and making excuses about not . This can help you deal with issues and challenges more easily and effectively. of the issue and will look for a solution. He happily, obliviously goes back to work. He drinks every night. Around 2am, I heard the scraping of a badly manoeuvred BBQ onto the deck and felt my husband flop down beside me into the bed. I went into Labor at 1AM after Superbowl Sunday - DH drank a good part of the day and night and had gone to bed around 11 that. I called and called and called him just to get that annoying beep saying he was already on the phone (with his brother) he would not answer my call. When he stopped drinking for a month, we conceived right away. I wish men weren't so stupid about some things. This happened to my friend. This consultation should happen long before a manager is faced with a worker who might be drunk on the job, she said. I folded those clothes some more. Well, after 21 years we are still happily married and you have to realize that you have to take the good with the bad. and my water broke at 2am so I tried calling him to tell him to come back. While at the hospital, my husband (then boyfriend), wasnt allowed into the theater with me, so he decided to go watch rugby at the pub. My husband told me to breathe. He passed out in my bed (I was in the chair) and proceeded to puke. And when they do, take them to the professional instead of trying to make things right on your own. Yeah, you know, cause he was the one up since 5 am working on pushing a 10 pound baby out of his body. In order to do you, you might push your husband to loneliness, which eventually will lead to far more serious issues than now. Glad she was there for you. I am not supporting buzz driving at all - but, it is amazing how much a woman in labor will sober up a man. The nurse made eye contact w/me, raised her eyebrows, and then lead him to the monitor to explain what was what, lol. You may be in active labor if your contractions happen at least every 5 minutes, last for 1 minute each, and have been . 1.) Nice. I beleive that 4th pregnancy has got to be my last. They can give you tips and suggestions on dealing with an alcoholic husband and the challenges that can arise during the recovery process. husband drunk when i went into labor. (Nurses are usually fabulous but it is always nice to have your own personal support person). If it's 5 hard drinks every night I would say that's a bit excessive to unwind. She was great because she understood. Lucky for him, he was standing just out of my reach. Get real, people. When I was in labor with our son my wife was AMAZING, a true hero. If the birth of his child is not enough to deter him from drinking for a few weeks, then he has a serious problem. After 30 hours of labor, it was time to go to the hospital and my husband informs me that he needs to run across the street to get his hair cut and I have the number if I need him. Braxton hicks will go away with rest, hydration and change of activity in most cases. My nurse who had me pushing literally would not let me catch my BREATH because she told me to push every 10 seconds..for 2 WHOLE HOURS. Nitrous oxide, a.k.a. My dad went out for tacos! I ended up having a C-section and he decided it would be best if he waited in the recovery room instead of coming into the E.R. Another call revealed him sitting at home, eating a sandwich, and checking on his World of Warcraft real quick. This is YOUR own husband being an alcoholic. While have contractions at home with my 1st child ( it was around 6pm and my contractions were coming every 5min) my husband called up to me from down stairs (I was on all 4s at this point) asking if I was hungry and he was going to order an Indian take-away. My husband and the doctor talked football the entire time I was pushing. When I called him an hour later because I was 9 centimeters he said he was at Sams buying Tupperware. After They told me I wasnt going back home, I called him and relayed the info. He arrived at the hospital with an emerald ring to give her..because after all, it was Mothers Day, and I was born in May. He still occasionally takes a beer, glass of wine or a rye down to the office when he's doing paperwork, but occasionally is the key word here. My DH never drinks like that, unless we're headed out for a crazy night with friends (every once in a while) or to a wedding or something. -Stephanie, My husband started throwing up while I was pushing. About a week later, when it all sunk in and I realised that I was that mother whose husband was basically flammable in the delivery suite, I realised I had been sitting on a teensy bit of suppressed anger. My brother and father arrived at around 10pm and my brother volunteers to go out and get some food for my husband. Hiding bottles or drinking secretly so that family will not know what . From funny to divorce-worthy to I-would-totally-understand-if-your-husband-turned-up-dead,here are 28 of my favorite examples of Crap Husbands Pull While Their Wives are in Labor. I've tried explaining this to him, but he . So the end result was his own personal police escort to the hospital. He slept it off too long, that should be the only issue, nit that he ate. The *only* reason I left the room when she was in labor was to go to the bathroom. I like the suggestion that if he's buzzed, he's not invited into the delivery room, and HE has to call his folks to explain why THEY need to drive me to the hospital. Not all men are alcoholics, or would make these choices, so stop generalizing all men to excuse your own husband's behaviour and choices (and your own choices to stay with him). I hope you haven't given up on this post. He doesn't drink that much EVERY night, but it happens, and I just KNOW with my luck, he will drink that much on the night I go into labor. My mom would have been my birth coach. Also I agree with a pp that it should be a conversation on the weekend or when he's realaxed and preferably sober. Seriously. Also, he decided at some point that the contraction monitor was a better gauge of my pain than I was: Oh, that one wasnt so bad. I nearly ripped his head off. Needless to say, when, four weeks later he was resting a pack of frozen peas on his testicles from the vasectomy hed breezily put his hand up for, my sympathy levels were small to non-existent. If you want to read all 237 responses (and YOU DO), click here. I even brought him the timer and paper and pen, so he wouldnt have to get up. 1 Answer. I think if he is unwilling to decrease the drinking NOW he is going to be unwilling to read anything you give him. With our second things went pretty well. Because she was in labor, he should have endured what, no food, no water, no bathroom, what is good enough? It is also a good idea to spend more time with your loved ones as this will reduce your stress levels and improve your mood. It sounds like you and your H are both in denial (as apparently are a few other posters on this thread). My mother, being Korean and not knowing any English had the most difficult time getting a hold of him. It was his decision. I'm worried, because I NEED a good labor coach to achieve my goal of a natural birth, but if the whole process begins with me being incredibly pissed at a buzzed DH, I will fail. Using alcohol is not an appropriate way to cope with stress. For example, someone might have a problem with drinking but deny it to themselves or their loved ones to avoid admitting they have a drinking problem. They might have difficulties controlling their emotions and be prone to anger or violent behavior when drunk. Suffer. I complained to my husband at 3 am in the morning that I was experiencing a lot of sharp pain. said he was not paying for any unnecessary pain medication since he witnessed many cows giving birth and they just plop them out. In the absence of a specific policy that the employee has agreed to abide by . We women are quite wonderful really. My husband and I have had our problems with his drinking in the past. He will NEVER live that down. Nausea and vomiting, diarrhea, and an overall feeling of being unwell. Rachell, I was in labor all night and ready to go in the morning. 1. This was compounded by the fact I went from water breaking to transition skipping the first four stages of labor ( I couldnt even talk). Second baby he was pretty good, except for when I would have a contraction (went through natural labors each time, no epidural, very little IV medication), he would look at the screen and say wow, that one went off the charts! and I would say you dont have to say that each time, Im going through it! Mine wasnt nearly as bad as these more just funny. Its a serious problem that can lead to social and physical problems. Its a disorder or an addiction that needs treatment than just taking the blame. It was our first child. Based on our calculations, the due date for our first child fell during my husband's biggest meeting of the year, which involved a lot of preparation, presentations, and traveling. Then just before we were about to leave for the hospital, he looked at me and said, are you really going with your hair looking like that? . -Angelia, My husband went downstairs to charge his phone and call his mom from the car. But he's probably young enough where that can all be avoided if he changes his patterns NOW. Ive got girlfriends who pretty much just lay it all on the table. Pack your own hospital bag. For you I would give your DH a heads up if you start feeling any contractions and have him head home if they start getting regular . It may be harsh but is needed. Remember, youre not to be blamed for their habit. He moved there from the recliner when I got up to walk down the hall to get myself a drink. Im 38 weeks pregnant so after a couple hours (10:30pm) I went inside with my 2 yr old, only to come back down to him still drinking and now smoking hookah with his brother, male cousins and 3 young thots that showed up. Ha, I thought to myself, hell be visiting the bathroom regularly tomorrow. Then, after I finally pushed my baby out (an hour and a half of pushing), he complained about being exhausted. Things start with a small incident and can lead to bigger uncontrollable incidences that will only bring shame to you and your family. Its just like this all the things men do wrong only it was just one man, My man, so dont nobody try to take him! Seriously, OP, the issues surrounding labour should be amongst the least of your concerns here. Yesterday, my husband got drunk at his family's cookout. When it comes to dealing with an alcoholic husband in denial, speaking to them about the issue in length seems a better option. I was in delivery with my second child in 12 months. He did much better the second time. Labour won't "sober him up" and make it safe for him to drive. I stop on the way home to fill up the truck and he calls me back asking if I was serious or if this was just a trail run to see how fast we could get everything readyOMG its not a test this is the real deal! But still no medal. While driving my manic husband was trying to count off 4 count breaths. Once labor begins, it can take between 10 to 24 hours (or more) to progress through the three stages of labor before your baby is born.

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